if the topic has ever come up you'll know I'm very wishy-washy with the notion of having a baby. I'm almost embarassed either way to want or not to want a child...I'm just not sold 100% either way...and my view on it changes a thousand times a week which gets the little troll on one shoulder to kick the other little troll and say "if she's not definately sure then she shouldn't do it...a baby is like a purchase from target.....you can NEVER return it!!!"I have trolls rather than angel/devils on my shoulder to keep things looking neutral you know.
I can think of a million reasons for either choice...which my therapist says is fantastic and doesn't make me less of a potential mother. I had great parents; honestly they are/were both cool as hell and we are/were friends.
The thing with having a baby is that it realistically has to be well timed...my husband works from feb-may 7 days a week, 10-16 hours a day so I can not...will not...pop out a kid during those months. If I can refrain from taking a dump all week while living in the dorms, I can keep a 3 month old duct taped in my womb...like that episode of cold case where the woman has the 27 year old dead calcified fetus inside her and her second husband just thinks the daughter she talks about all the time just lives far away...well maybe not just like that but I digress...
I went to the gyno yesterday and while I know what she told me was right, it pissed me off and knocked the wind temporarily from my sails...not that I was planning on getting myself pregnant anytime soon...the magic window of time remember...but like a little kid, being told you can't do something sure makes you want it a little more...or at least the opportunity to do it if you want to. She told me I had to "step up" my exercise...which I had been proud of :( and she is referring me to a registered dietician...which I am excited about because obviously I'm all about that.
The additional weight she wants me to lose is daunting, and while I knowww she's right (did I say that already? I'm iPhone blogging and it's a total pain to "scroll" up to see) it is frustrating. Either way I always intended to see that number on the scale again...someday...but I guess I wanted it to be on my time frame...which in reality hasn't worked out all that well for me in the past haha.
I guess if I reach the magic number by next august (the first magic window timeline month) and I have made up my mind then I'll be ready...I guess we'll all just have to see if my prize will be a sweet fuzzy headed little squirt...or a retainment of my sleeping-in options, a full body tuck to remove all my extra skin, and a tricked out mustang. Don't comment to tell me I can have my cake and eat it too...no cake for me, I have weight to lose!
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101 in 1001
Starting November 13, 2008 and ending August 12, 2011 (unless there is a leap year in there somewhere...)
1. Volunteer at a soup kitchen on a holiday (0/1)
2. Go white-water rafting (0/1)
3. Graduate from WVU with a B.S.A. in Human Nutrition and Foods, and a B.A. in English (0/2) decided against the BA in English :-( so this is now (0/1) let's change this to: i will make at least one MAJOR life-altering change (0/1)
4. Volunteer at the Lord's Pantry at least once a month (1/33)
5. Call my Granny more often
6. lose 5 pants sizes (3/5)
7.GET PREGNANT!!! (um decided maybe not so much.....)so we'll say: make a salad completely from things i've grown (0/1)
8. rescue a 2nd shih tzu (1/1)
9. go to hawaii (0/1)
10. take dennis on his first trip to disneyworld (0/1)
11. donate something to the humane society every month (0/33)
12. fit into something from the woman's side of the gap (0/1)
13. walk my dog at least once a week (0/143)
14. volunteer at the humane society 5 times (0/5)
15. do an art project with my nephew (1/1)
16. take a dance class (1/1)
17. have real thai food (0/1)
18. take 2 classes i love just for fun (0/2)
19. get my passport
20. go 30 straight days without spending any money (1/30)
21. get my rings sized down
22. host 2 dinner parties (0/2)
23. send 10 "just because" gifts (1/10)
24. finish 3 previously started craft projects (1/3)
25. learn to use my sewing machine (1/1)
26. give blood 6 times (1/6)
27. learn to purl (as in knit and purl) (1/1)
28. laugh until i cry (1/1)
29. change the flowers on my dad's grave every month (0/33)
30. soak at berkeley springs (0/1)
31. exercise 3 times a week (0/429)
32. grow my hair out to donate for locks of love (0/1)
34. participate in a memory walk (0/1)
35. particpate in relay for life again (1/1)
36. drop groceries off anonymously for someone i know who really needs it (0/1)
37. go to the italian heritage festival (1/1)
38. ride the train at cass (0/1)
39. buy for someone off the angel tree annually (1/2)
40. send my mom a funny card each month (0/33)
41. learn how to use, and make 1 spreadsheet on Access (0/1)
42. use my crockpot everyday for thirty days (0/30)
43. go on a 30 mile bike ride at least once (0/1)
44. do hatha yoga every day (1/1001)
45. get my wedding dress cleaned and preserved (0/1)
46. have 5 servings of fruits and veggies a day (1/1001)
47. clean my house martha stewart style from top to bottom (0/1)
48. develop a weekly cleaning schedule (0/1)
49. stick to cleaning schedule for 8 weeks (0/8)
50. donate 50,000 grains of rice (1000/50,000)
51. write a blog entry for every completed item (0/101)
52. get max certified as a good canine citizen (0/1)
53. after getting him GCC certified, use him as a therapy dog 6 times (0/6)
54. go shopping with my sister-in-laws (1/1)
55. take my mom to whole foods and trader joes (1/1)
56. take my mom to ikea (1/1)
57. go to the theatre with my mom (0/1)
58. eat at pies and pints (1/1)
59. try one new recipe a week (2/143)
60. buy a new fruit, veggie or healthy product at the grocery store each week (0/143)
61. do something every week for the greater good (1/143)
62. blog about what i do for #61 (0/143)
63. go shopping and to dinner with each sister-in-law separately (1/2)
64. visit with a friend at least once a month (6/33)
65. go to the pittsburgh zoo (1/1)
66. go to the andy warhold museum (1/1)
67. throw pottery 6 times (0/6)
68. go to a wvu homecoming game (0/1)
69. donate something to the church in my dad's honor (0/1)
70. sell 5 things on etsy (2/5)
71. get a portrait taken of my husband and brother for my mom (0/1)
72. blog 101 things that make me happy (0/101)
73. bake bread once a week (2/143)
74. try pumpkin ravioli (1/1)
75. get a hot stone massage (0/1)
76. perform 50, random, anonymous acts of kindness (0/50)
77. have an entirely homemade gifts christmas (0/1)
78. finish an embroidery project (0/1)
79. brush max twice a week (0/286)
80. ride my bike on the rail trail from enterprise to morgantown (0/1)
81. make my own seitan (0/1)
82. borrow my brother in law's saxophone and learn to play again (0/1)
83. learn 1 song on the trumpet
84. put 5 things on freecycle (5/5)
85. get all my craft things organized (0/1)
86. fill out an address book (0/1)
87. use a coupon at the grocery store every week (1/143)
88. go to church once a month (0/33)
89. make 5 things each from my 5 newest cookbooks (1/25)
90. sheen stripe the wall in my futurenursery office (0/1)
91. make new pillow covers for my living room pillows (0/8)
92. vacuumn once a week (0/143)
93. taste 10 things i "don't think" i'd like (10/10)
94. get an acupuncture treatment (0/1)
95. see a movie in a theatre by myself (1/1)
96. buy tea from an old friend (0/1)
97. read harry potter goblet of fire, order of the phoenix, half-blood prince, and deathly hallows (0/4)
98. take the italian language and cooking class from fairmont state
99. see 10 plays even if i have to go alone (0/10)
100. get my WVU diploma(s) framed (0/3)
101. make another list to complete for the next 1001 days! (0/1)
1. Volunteer at a soup kitchen on a holiday (0/1)
2. Go white-water rafting (0/1)
3. Graduate from WVU with a B.S.A. in Human Nutrition and Foods, and a B.A. in English (0/2) decided against the BA in English :-( so this is now (0/1) let's change this to: i will make at least one MAJOR life-altering change (0/1)
4. Volunteer at the Lord's Pantry at least once a month (1/33)
5. Call my Granny more often
6. lose 5 pants sizes (3/5)
7.
8. rescue a 2nd shih tzu (1/1)
9. go to hawaii (0/1)
10. take dennis on his first trip to disneyworld (0/1)
11. donate something to the humane society every month (0/33)
12. fit into something from the woman's side of the gap (0/1)
13. walk my dog at least once a week (0/143)
14. volunteer at the humane society 5 times (0/5)
15. do an art project with my nephew (1/1)
16. take a dance class (1/1)
17. have real thai food (0/1)
18. take 2 classes i love just for fun (0/2)
19. get my passport
20. go 30 straight days without spending any money (1/30)
21. get my rings sized down
22. host 2 dinner parties (0/2)
23. send 10 "just because" gifts (1/10)
24. finish 3 previously started craft projects (1/3)
25. learn to use my sewing machine (1/1)
26. give blood 6 times (1/6)
27. learn to purl (as in knit and purl) (1/1)
28. laugh until i cry (1/1)
29. change the flowers on my dad's grave every month (0/33)
30. soak at berkeley springs (0/1)
31. exercise 3 times a week (0/429)
32. grow my hair out to donate for locks of love (0/1)
34. participate in a memory walk (0/1)
35. particpate in relay for life again (1/1)
36. drop groceries off anonymously for someone i know who really needs it (0/1)
37. go to the italian heritage festival (1/1)
38. ride the train at cass (0/1)
39. buy for someone off the angel tree annually (1/2)
40. send my mom a funny card each month (0/33)
41. learn how to use, and make 1 spreadsheet on Access (0/1)
42. use my crockpot everyday for thirty days (0/30)
43. go on a 30 mile bike ride at least once (0/1)
44. do hatha yoga every day (1/1001)
45. get my wedding dress cleaned and preserved (0/1)
46. have 5 servings of fruits and veggies a day (1/1001)
47. clean my house martha stewart style from top to bottom (0/1)
48. develop a weekly cleaning schedule (0/1)
49. stick to cleaning schedule for 8 weeks (0/8)
50. donate 50,000 grains of rice (1000/50,000)
51. write a blog entry for every completed item (0/101)
52. get max certified as a good canine citizen (0/1)
53. after getting him GCC certified, use him as a therapy dog 6 times (0/6)
54. go shopping with my sister-in-laws (1/1)
55. take my mom to whole foods and trader joes (1/1)
56. take my mom to ikea (1/1)
57. go to the theatre with my mom (0/1)
58. eat at pies and pints (1/1)
59. try one new recipe a week (2/143)
60. buy a new fruit, veggie or healthy product at the grocery store each week (0/143)
61. do something every week for the greater good (1/143)
62. blog about what i do for #61 (0/143)
63. go shopping and to dinner with each sister-in-law separately (1/2)
64. visit with a friend at least once a month (6/33)
65. go to the pittsburgh zoo (1/1)
66. go to the andy warhold museum (1/1)
67. throw pottery 6 times (0/6)
68. go to a wvu homecoming game (0/1)
69. donate something to the church in my dad's honor (0/1)
70. sell 5 things on etsy (2/5)
71. get a portrait taken of my husband and brother for my mom (0/1)
72. blog 101 things that make me happy (0/101)
73. bake bread once a week (2/143)
74. try pumpkin ravioli (1/1)
75. get a hot stone massage (0/1)
76. perform 50, random, anonymous acts of kindness (0/50)
77. have an entirely homemade gifts christmas (0/1)
78. finish an embroidery project (0/1)
79. brush max twice a week (0/286)
80. ride my bike on the rail trail from enterprise to morgantown (0/1)
81. make my own seitan (0/1)
82. borrow my brother in law's saxophone and learn to play again (0/1)
83. learn 1 song on the trumpet
84. put 5 things on freecycle (5/5)
85. get all my craft things organized (0/1)
86. fill out an address book (0/1)
87. use a coupon at the grocery store every week (1/143)
88. go to church once a month (0/33)
89. make 5 things each from my 5 newest cookbooks (1/25)
90. sheen stripe the wall in my future
91. make new pillow covers for my living room pillows (0/8)
92. vacuumn once a week (0/143)
93. taste 10 things i "don't think" i'd like (10/10)
94. get an acupuncture treatment (0/1)
95. see a movie in a theatre by myself (1/1)
96. buy tea from an old friend (0/1)
97. read harry potter goblet of fire, order of the phoenix, half-blood prince, and deathly hallows (0/4)
98. take the italian language and cooking class from fairmont state
99. see 10 plays even if i have to go alone (0/10)
100. get my WVU diploma(s) framed (0/3)
101. make another list to complete for the next 1001 days! (0/1)
3 comments:
I'm looking forward to Julio's next week...please tell me you're psyched!
I am ;-) I hope we will have a small cutie pie joining us! It will be worth a couple extra workouts lol
We are the same exact way. There are great reasons to have a kid and great reasons to not have a kid. I just don't think I can go through life without having that experience. But I also want/need to lose weight before that can happen. It would be nice to see my belly grow instead of stay the same size while I'm pregnant, lol. BTW, you're exercise regimen sounds awesome to me!!
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